Drew's Blog

Golf is Not a Game of Perfect by Bob Rotella

3/2/2019

I can't believe I did not do any Bob Rotella last year. He was my original intro to the mental game of golf and got me interested in sports psychology. Golf is Not a Game of Perfect is his first book and is a 101 level review of playing the mental game of golf. You can also apply most of these concepts to other sports or life in general.

Key Takeaways

Develop a routine to make performance more consistent.
Create an image of the result you want in your mind.
Come up with a game plan to limit decision making in the heat of the moment.
Love the process.
Your body doesn't respond to "don't," instead, it responds to images.

Memorable Quotes

A golfer has to learn to enjoy the process of striving to improve. That process, not the end result, enriches life.
Golfing potential depends primarily on a player’s attitude, on how well he plays with the wedges and the putter, and on how well he thinks.
The smaller the target, the sharper the athlete’s focus, the better his concentration, and the better the results.
It will try to send the ball in the direction of the last thing you look at or think about. If that happens to be a pond, you can find yourself in severe trouble. So if you’re preparing to hit an approach shot over water, or a pitch over a bunker to a pin, it’s important that you have an established habit of focusing your mind firmly on your target.
Attitude would always win out over ability.
Second, golfers often have a problem of perception. If a player, facing a tee shot, starts to remember shots she’s hit out of bounds, is she being realistic? Or is she being unduly harsh on herself? If she thought about it, she’d probably remember that she’s hit far more tee shots in bounds than out of bounds during the course of her golfing career. Remembering one of the good shots, therefore, would be far more realistic than remembering a shot that sliced out of bounds. But golfers, particularly high-handicappers, often perceive themselves too negatively. They allow the bad shots to dominate their memories.

Rating: 8/10
This is a must read for any golfer looking to get more out of their technical skills. Especially valuable for tournament or competitive golfers, it covers the basics. Other similar reads include Zen Golf and Harvey Penick's Little Red Book.

The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Don Miguel Ruiz

3/2/2019

This one was a bit over my head, but worth another read. I had the vague sense that it contains profound wisdom, but I couldn't quite grasp it. I definitely took some wisdom away, but also feel like I only scratched the surface. Everything flows from the four agreements:

Be impeccable with your word.
Don’t take anything personally.
Don’t make assumptions.
Always do your best.

Taking these to heart and living by them will change the way you look at the world. They'll improve every goal, every relationship, and every experience you have.

Key Takeaways

Be impeccable with your word.
Don't take anything personally.
Don't make assumptions.
Always do your best.
Be a warrior.

Memorable Quotes

If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. If that person doesn't walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her. Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal. Then you can choose what you really want. You will find that you don't need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices.
Whatever happens around you, don't take it personally... Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves.
If others tell us something we make assumptions, and if they don't tell us something we make assumptions to fulfill our need to know and to replace the need to communicate. Even if we hear something and we don't understand we make assumptions about what it means and then believe the assumptions. We make all sorts of assumptions because we don't have the courage to ask questions.
I will no longer allow anyone to manipulate my mind and control my life in the name of love.
God is life. God is life in action. The best way to say, "I love you, God," is to live your life doing your best. The best way to say, "Thank you, God," is by letting go of the past and living in the present moment, right here and now. Whatever life takes away from you, let it go. When you surrender and let go of the past, you allow yourself to be fully alive in the moment. Letting go of the past means you can enjoy the dream that is happening right now.
Every human is an artist. The dream of your life is to make beautiful art.
If you live in a past dream, you don't enjoy what is happening right now because you will always wish it to be different than it is. There is no time to miss anyone or anything because you are alive. Not enjoying what is happening right now is living in the past and being only half alive. This leads to self pity, suffering and tears.
But it is not what I am saying that is hurting you; it is that you have wounds that I touch by what I have said. You are hurting yourself. There is no way I can take this personally.
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama.
You can have many great ideas in your head, but what makes the difference is the action. Without action upon an idea, there will be no manifestation, no results, and no reward.
There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally.
Wherever you go you will find people lying to you, and as your awareness grows, you will notice that you also lie to yourself. Do not expect people to tell you the truth because they also lie to themselves. You have to trust yourself and choose to believe or not to believe what someone says to you.
True justice is paying only once for each mistake. True injustice is paying more than once for each mistake.
Also, go inside and listen to your body, because your body will never lie to you. Your mind will play tricks, but the way you feel in your heart, in your guts, is the truth.
What you will see is love coming out of the trees, love coming out of the sky, love coming out of the light. You will perceive love from everything around you. This is the state of bliss.
The big difference between a warrior and a victim is that the victim represses and the warrior refrains.
Whenever we hear an opinion and believe it, we make an agreement, and it becomes part of our belief system.
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use your power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

Rating: 8.5/10
I have more to learn here. I may review and update to a 10/10 at some point when I understand better. This is a great supplement to any Stoic reading like Ego is the Enemy or The Obstacle is the Way.

Rich Dad's Cashflow Quadrant: Rich Dad's Guide to Financial Freedom by Robert Kiyosaki

3/2/2019

Cashflow Quadrant is a bit of a sequel to Rich Dad, Poor Dad. Robert Kiyosaki delivers on this one again. This covers the mindset required to build wealth and achieve financial freedom. The "Cashflow Quadrant" is an understanding of where you make money from. Aim to move from the left side (employee or self-employed) to the right side (business owner or investor). Those in the left side work for their money and pay the government first in taxes. Those in the right side have their money work for them, and they pay the government after themselves. This is why the rich always seem to get richer. The right siders achieve financial freedom. Financial Freedom is when you do not have to work to cover your monthly expenses. This is true freedom.

Key Takeaways

You cannot keep the same mindset as an employee when you move to a business owner or an investor.
The right side requires different skills and experiences than the left side.
Building wealth is a game. You win some, and you lose some, but if you don't play, you can't win at all.
Failure is a step on the way to success.
Wealth is as much a mindset as it is technical skills and understanding.

Memorable Quotes

One of the quotes credited to Ford goes: "Thinking is the hardest work there is. That is why so few people engage in it.”
If you want to be a leader of people, then you need to be a master of words.
Many people will not head down the street until all the lights are green. That is why they don't go anywhere.
Remember that anything important can't really be learned in the classroom. It must be learned by taking action, making mistakes, and then correcting them. That's when wisdom sets in.
Finding your path means finding out what you were put here on this earth to do. What is your life's purpose? Why were you given this gift called life? And what is the gift you give back to life?
We learn the most about ourselves when we fail, so don't be afraid of failing. Failing is part of the process of success. You can't have success without failure.
Rich dad said that financial intelligence determined, not so much how much money you make, but how much money you keep, how hard that money works for you, and how many generations you can keep it.
You can always quit. So why quit now?
A mentor is someone who has already done what you want to do and is successful at doing it. Don't find an advisor. An advisor is someone who tells you how to do it but may not have personally done it.
My best advice is to prepare daily to be bigger than your smallness. In my opinion, the reason most people stop and turn back from their dreams is because the tiny person found inside each of us wields more power than our bigger person.
No matter what anyone is saying to you from outside, the most important conversation is the one you are having with yourself on the inside.
People think that working hard for money and then buying things that make them look rich will make them rich. In most cases it doesn't. It only makes them more tired. They call it ‘Keeping up with the Joneses.' And if you notice, the Joneses are exhausted.
In times of great economic change, there are always great transfer of wealth. Even if you do not have much money, it is important to invest in your education... for when the changes come, you will be better prepared for them. Don't be caught unaware and afraid. As I said, no one can predict what will happen, yet it is best to be prepared for whatever happens. And that means getting educated now.
Trust that you have everything you need right now to be successful financially. All it takes to bring out your natural, God-given gifts is your desire, determination, and a deep faith that you have a genius and a gift that is unique.

Rating: 9/10
Cashflow Quadrant covers many of the same concepts as Rich Dad, Poor Dad. It digs deeper into the mindset changes and new skills required to shift to the right side. Another eye-opening read on personal finance and financial freedom for me. I look forward to digging in more on this subject.

Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on It by Chris Voss

3/2/2019

Before reading Never Split the Difference, I had little understanding of negotiation. Chris Voss used to run hostage negotiations for the FBI. This skill has endless applications, from setting salary to getting your kids to bed. The book covers many strategies and tactics that you can put to good use today.

Key Takeaways

Effective negotiation is an exercise in empathy and understanding others.
Learn to disagree without being disagreeable.
Use "It sounds like..." to ensure you understand your counterpart.
Listen for the "that's right..." moment.
You must prepare for every negotiation.

Memorable Quotes

He who has learned to disagree without being disagreeable has discovered the most valuable secret of negotiation.
Conflict brings out truth, creativity, and resolution.
Negotiate in their world. Persuasion is not about how bright or smooth or forceful you are. It’s about the other party convincing themselves that the solution you want is their own idea. So don’t beat them with logic or brute force. Ask them questions that open paths to your goals. It’s not about you.
If you approach a negotiation thinking the other guy thinks like you, you are wrong. That's not empathy, that's a projection.
The beauty of empathy is that it doesn’t demand that you agree with the other person’s ideas.
Psychotherapy research shows that when individuals feel listened to, they tend to listen to themselves more carefully and to openly evaluate and clarify their own thoughts and feelings.
The Rule of Three is simply getting the other guy to agree to the same thing three times in the same conversation. It’s tripling the strength of whatever dynamic you’re trying to drill into at the moment. In doing so, it uncovers problems before they happen. It’s really hard to repeatedly lie or fake conviction.
Identify your counterpart’s negotiating style. Once you know whether they are Accommodator, Assertive, or Analyst, you’ll know the correct way to approach them.
Prepare, prepare, prepare. When the pressure is on, you don’t rise to the occasion; you fall to your highest level of preparation. So design an ambitious but legitimate goal and then game out the labels, calibrated questions, and responses you’ll use to get there. That way, once you’re at the bargaining table, you won’t have to wing it.
Get ready to take a punch. Kick-ass negotiators usually lead with an extreme anchor to knock you off your game. If you’re not ready, you’ll flee to your maximum without a fight. So prepare your dodging tactics to avoid getting sucked into the compromise trap.
Set boundaries, and learn to take a punch or punch back, without anger. The guy across the table is not the problem; the situation is.
Prepare an Ackerman plan. Before you head into the weeds of bargaining, you’ll need a plan of extreme anchor, calibrated questions, and well-defined offers. Remember: 65, 85, 95, 100 percent. Decreasing raises and ending on nonround numbers will get your counterpart to believe that he’s squeezing you for all you’re worth when you’re really getting to the number you want.
Negotiation is not an act of battle; it’s a process of discovery. The goal is to uncover as much information as possible.
The last rule of labeling is silence. Once you’ve thrown out a label, be quiet and listen.
The fastest and most efficient means of establishing a quick working relationship is to acknowledge the negative and diffuse it.

Rating: 9/10
Another great general purpose book. You can use it to make any conflict easier and to sway things in your desired direction. If you're in business or you're a parent, you'll find immediate uses for some of the tactics in this book. Also worth investigating: Thinking Fast and Slow, How to Win Friends and Influence People, and Influence. This one will be worth reviewing more than once.

What I Learned from Reading 59 Books in 2018

2/10/2019

I read a grand total of 59 books in 2018. Something about constant learning brings me great joy. I know I'll never stop growing and I look forward to building even greater understanding in 2019. Here's the highlights, lowlights, and what I take away from 2018.

Lowlights
I start with the lowlights because they're pretty forgettable. Even the worst books still taught me something, so it wasn't a waste of time.

TB12 – I love Tom Brady as an athlete, but found his book self-aggrandizing and annoying.
MBA Admission Guide – I did not enjoy reading this all that much, but I did realize that I don't want to go back for an MBA.
The Singularity Trap – I loved the Bobiverse books and was expecting similar quality. Expectations tend to lead to disappointment!

Highlights
I definitely covered some great books this year. I look forward to re-reading some of them in 2019.

Snow Crash – An old favorite, and one of the best sci-fi books around.
Mastery – Robert Greene is a legend. I can't wait to re-read this one in print so that I can take notes.
The Truth – Neil Strauss constructed a therapy session in a book. I broke through to a new level with regard to my relationships.
Extreme Ownership – A new look on leadership and great takeaways for my team at work.
Thinking Fast and Slow – A master class in social psychology.
The Obstacle is the Way – A practical operating system for life and its challenges.

In 2018 I learned
Across all 59 books, I averaged a rating of 8.40. That may or may not tell you something about me as a person.

With an average of 8.40, I'm either too nice, or I'm better at choosing books than I should be. I suppose it could be a combination of the two. I would expect the average to be closer to 7.5. I will push myself to be more critical and to dig deeper into nuance in 2019.
At 59 books, I accomplished my goal of over 1 book per week. I aim to hit 52 again in 2018.

Strengths Finder 2.0

2/10/2019

Strengths Finder 2.0 is a practical diagnostic manual. It includes a great summary of every one of the 34 potential strengths. It also includes a code for an online diagnostic to find your own strengths. This diagnostic also includes recommendations to try, as well as who to enlist for help.

Key Takeaways

Greatness comes more from maximizing strengths than from minimizing weaknesses.
I'm a Relator - I tend to connect people.
I'm a Learner - I prioritize learning and process over results.
I'm Futuristic - I love to peer beyond the present, especially with technology.
I have Focus - I need a clear path and a clear destination.
I'm Restorative - I enjoy solving problems.

Memorable Quotes

From the cradle to the cubicle, we devote more time to our shortcomings than to our strengths.
the key to human development is building on who you already are
When we're able to put most of our energy into developing our natural talents, extraordinary room for growth exists. So, a revision to the "You-can-be-anything-you-want-to-be" maxim might be more accurate: You cannot be anything you want to be—but you can be a lot more of who you already are.
Talent (a natural way of thinking, feeling, or behaving) × Investment (time spent practicing, developing your skills, and building your knowledge base) = Strength (the ability to consistently provide near-perfect performance)
The most successful people start with dominant talent—and then add skills, knowledge, and practice to the mix. When they do this, the raw talent actually serves as a multiplier.
You cannot be anything you want to be — but you can be a lot more of who you already are.
It appears that the epidemic of active disengagement we see in workplaces every day could be a curable disease…if we can help the people around us develop their strengths.
What's more, we had discovered that people have several times more potential for growth, when they invest energy in developing their strenghts instead of correcting their deficiencies.
Every human being has talents that are just waiting to be uncovered.
Building your talents into real strengths also requires practice and hard work, much like it does to build physical strengths.

Rating: 9/10
Everything that came out of the SF2 assessment rings true. Going forward, I plan to spend much more time maximizing these strengths. I realize maximizing those strengths will make me successful. Self-awareness is key to relating in any team or social situation. Reading this book and taking the assessment will build that much-needed awareness.

$100 Startup by Chris Guillebeau

2/10/2019

The subtitle for this book is: Reinvent the Way You Make a Living, Do What You Love, and Create a New Future. The book covers a process anyone can take to start a simple business that generates a profit. That could be a lifestyle business, a consultancy, or a high-growth startup. In any case, you now have a clear path to success. I'm not saying you won't fail along the way, but you can continue to refine using this process until you don't.

Key Takeaways

Test, test, test.
Simple wins.
Customer service wins.
Working a regular job might not be a great long-term financial or life decision.

Memorable Quotes

Don’t waste your time living someone else’s life.
value is created when a person makes something useful and shares it with the world.
Plans are only good intentions unless they immediately degenerate into hard work.
Good things happen to those who hustle.
To succeed in a business project, especially one you’re excited about, it helps to think carefully about all the skills you have that could be helpful to others and particularly about the combination of those skills.
A desk is a dangerous place from which to view the world. —JOHN LE CARRÉ
The new reality is that working at a job may be the far riskier choice.
think more about what people really want than about what you think they need.
As you begin to think like an entrepreneur, you’ll notice that business ideas can come from anywhere.
The need for change bulldozed a road down the center of my mind. — MAYA ANGELOU
In the future, marketing will be like sex: Only the losers pay for it.
Ask three questions for every idea: a. How would I get paid with this idea? b. How much would I get paid from this idea? c. Is there a way I could get paid more than once?
If you make your business about helping others, you’ll always have plenty of work.
Value means helping people. If you’re trying to build a microbusiness and you begin your efforts by helping people, you’re on the right track. When you get stuck, ask yourself: How can I give more value? Or more simply: How can I help my customers more?

Rating: 9/10
This is a simple, powerful playbook to starting a simple, profitable business. I'll come back to this every time a new idea comes to me. I can run it through its paces to figure out what to pursue and what to abandon. Anyone who wants to start a business should read this.

21 Lessons for the 21st Century by Yuval Noah Harrari

2/10/2019

Yuval Noah Harari is one author who I'll always read. 21 Lessons splits the difference between Sapiens and Homo Deus. It focuses on our immediate present and the challenges facing us. It frames them as opportunities - things we can solve for everyone's benefit. While there are many challenges, we also do know how to start tackling them. I look forward to Harari's next book too!

Key Takeaways

Question everything.
We must understand the myths that support our beliefs. We must be able to question those myths.
Silence does not make change.
Stories are more persuasive than facts.

Memorable Quotes

Questions you cannot answer are usually far better for you than answers you cannot question.
Morality doesn’t mean ‘following divine commands’. It means ‘reducing suffering’. Hence in order to act morally, you don’t need to believe in any myth or story. You just need to develop a deep appreciation of suffering.
In a world deluged by irrelevant information, clarity is power.
Silence isn’t neutrality; it is supporting the status-quo.
One potential remedy for human stupidity is a dose of humility. National, religious and cultural tensions are made worse by the grandiose feeling that my nation, my religion and my culture are the most important in the world – hence my interests should come before the interests of anyone else, or of humankind as a whole. How can we make nations, religions and cultures a bit more realistic and modest about their true place in the world?
When the faithful are asked whether God really exists, they often begin by talking about the enigmatic mysteries of the universe and the limits of human understanding. ‘Science cannot explain the Big Bang,’ they exclaim, ‘so that must be God’s doing.’ Yet like a magician fooling an audience by imperceptibly replacing one card with another, the faithful quickly replace the cosmic mystery with the worldly lawgiver. After giving the name of ‘God’ to the unknown secrets of the cosmos, they then use this to somehow condemn bikinis and divorces. ‘We do not understand the Big Bang – therefore you must cover your hair in public and vote against gay marriage.’ Not only is there no logical connection between the two, but they are in fact contradictory. The deeper the mysteries of the universe, the less likely it is that whatever is responsible for them gives a damn about female dress codes or human sexual behaviour.
Humans think in stories rather than in facts, numbers, or equations, and the simpler the story, the better.
Philosophers are very patient people, but engineers are far less patient, and investors are the least patient of all.
The greatest crimes in modern history resulted not just from hatred and greed, but even more so from ignorance and indifference.
Humans were always far better at inventing tools than using them wisely.
At present, people are happy to give away their most valuable asset—their personal data—in exchange for free email services and funny cat videos. It’s a bit like African and Native American tribes who unwittingly sold entire countries to European imperialists in exchange for colorful beads and cheap trinkets.

Rating: 9/10
I never fully grasp everything that Harari discusses in his books. That said, I do come away with a profound sense for today's world and where we're going. I'm optimistic for the future with leaders like Harari. Leaders who have a deep understanding of the challenges will take us forward to the next set of problems.

Rich Dad Poor Dad: What the Rich Teach Their Kids About Money That the Poor and Middle Class Do Not! by Robert Kiyosaki

2/10/2019

This book injected some much needed financial literacy and inspiration into my life. Robert Kiyosaki has an interesting take on personal finance and investing. I learned a few tidbits here and there, but it also got me thinking with the right mindset about my finances.

Key Takeaways

Use taxes and businesses to your advantage.
Do not be afraid to lose.
Your attitudes about money are a reflection of those of your parents.
You must take control of your financial life.
Rich people and poor people have very different attitudes towards money and investing.

Memorable Quotes

In school we learn that mistakes are bad, and we are punished for making them. Yet, if you look at the way humans are designed to learn, we learn by making mistakes. We learn to walk by falling down. If we never fell down, we would never walk.
Winners are not afraid of losing. But losers are. Failure is part of the process of success. People who avoid failure also avoid success.
You’re only poor if you give up. The most important thing is that you did something. Most people only talk and dream of getting rich.
If you’re the kind of person who has no guts, you just give up every time life pushes you. If you’re that kind of person, you’ll live all your life playing it safe, doing the right things, saving yourself for something that never happens. Then, you die a boring old man.
I’d rather welcome change than cling to the past.
Emotions are what make us human. Make us real. The word 'emotion' stands for energy in motion. Be truthful about your emotions, and use your mind and emotions in your favor, not against yourself.
The single most powerful asset we all have is our mind. If it is trained well, it can create enormous wealth in what seems to be an instant.
If you realize that you're the problem, then you can change yourself, learn something and grow wiser. Don't blame other people for your problems.

Rating: 9.5/10
A change of mindset is priceless. In the past I've avoided thinking and talking about money because I don't know much about how it all works! But this book changed my mind on this front. I've begun engaging much more around money, finance, and accounting. I now recognize that the more I know, the more likely I am to use it to my advantage in real life.

You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life by Jen Sincero

2/10/2019

This is another wonderful inspirational book. I had not heard of Jen Sincero before picking this up, but I started seeing this book everywhere. Someone on her team is doing some impressive marketing!

Key Takeaways

No excuses, play like a champion.
Be responsible for your life.
You are not responsible for the thoughts or actions of others.
If you want something, you'll find a way to make it happen.
Savor the journey.
Don't apologize for who you are.

Memorable Quotes

If you’re serious about changing your life, you’ll find a way. If you’re not, you’ll find an excuse.
You are responsible for what you say and do. You are not responsible for whether or not people freak out about it.
You are perfect. To think anything less is as pointless as a river thinking that it’s got too many curves or that it moves too slowly or that its rapids are too rapid. Says who? You’re on a journey with no defined beginning, middle or end. There are no wrong twists and turns. There is just being. And your job is to be as you as you can be. This is why you’re here. To shy away from who you truly are would leave the world you-less. You are the only you there is and ever will be. I repeat, you are the only you there is and ever will be. Do not deny the world its one and only chance to bask in your brilliance.
You are loved. Massively. Ferociously. Unconditionally. The Universe is totally freaking out about how awesome you are. It’s got you wrapped in a warm gorilla hug of adoration. It wants to give you everything you desire. It wants you to be happy. It wants you to see what it sees in you.
What other people think about you has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.
There’s nothing as unstoppable as a freight train full of fuck-yeah.
It never ceases to amaze me the precious time we spend chasing the squirrels around our brains, playing out our dramas, worrying about unwanted facial hair, seeking adoration, justifying our actions, complaining about slow Internet connections, dissecting the lives of idiots, when we are sitting in the middle of a full-blown miracle that is happening right here, right now. We're on a planet that somehow knows how to rotate on its axis and follow a defined path while it hurtles through space! Our hearts beat! We can see! We have love, laughter, language, living rooms, computers, compassion, cars, fire, fingernails, flowers, music, medicine, mountains, muffins!
So often, we pretend we’ve made a decision, when what we’ve really done is signed up to try until it gets too uncomfortable.
Imagine what our world would be like if everyone loved themselves so much that they weren’t threatened by other people’s opinions or skin colors or sexual preferences or talents or education or possessions or lack of possessions or religious beliefs or customs or their general tendency to just be whoever the hell they are.
Never apologize for who you are. It lets the whole world down.

Rating: 9/10
I finished this book ready to take on the whole world. I have a lot more work to get there, but this book had me excited to jump in.

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